Kelly Alvarez is a survivor who perseveres, encourages, and loves everyone she comes across. Today as I sat in her presence, I felt incredibly comfortable, safe, and cared for, and that is because of who Kelly is – she is love. In 2018, Kelly and her family lived through the unfathomable as her 21-year-old son died to suicide. Antonio Domingo Alvarez was born on February 4, 1997 and Kelly loved him from the very first breath. What makes Kelly so remarkable is how she chooses to honor his life with each passing year.
Each year on February 4, Kelly has a tradition of celebrating Antonio’s birthday by showering other people with gifts. She starts her day at Meijer where she pays for two randomly preordered birthday cakes with a note to the family that they share a birthday with her beloved son and that they matter. She follows that up with a shopping trip for everything a baby might need and then drops it off to the hospital to be gifted to any baby born that day. Her grandson, Canelo, who resembles his father Antonio, spends the day with Kelly passing out matchbox cars to kids they pass throughout the day – cars were Antonio’s favorite toys growing up.
Kelly spends a great deal of time helping to raise her grandson. She says he is the greatest blessing to her, reminding her of Antonio’s life every day. She regularly takes him to his dad’s memorial at Ellsworth Park where they decorate the area for each holiday. She is so thankful to the City of Danville for allowing her to have a memorial where she found her son. She says the memorial restores her hope and “it serves as a reminder to others to stop and think – I matter.” The stone reads, “Place your hand over your heart, can you feel it? That is called PURPOSE. You’re alive for a reason, so don’t give up.”
Kelly reflects on what it was like losing her son, saying that she did not really understand depression until she hit rock bottom herself. She has so much gratitude to her community. “They showed up, brought food, showed simple acts of kindness, asked and truly cared to listen, and then they let me help them, too.” Today, Kelly spends a great deal of her free time taking phone calls from those in need, helping people find the resources they need. She says, “It is shocking how many people are struggling. So many people are without hope. We need to remind them that they matter.”
Kelly reminds people of their worth in so many ways. She works at Danville Area Community College where she is the Early Childhood Education Director. She pours into her students and encourages them. A colleague mentions, “She is a favorite teacher at DACC, loved by both her students and her co-workers.” Kelly also has a Facebook Community Page called “You Matter: Inspired by Antonio Alvarez”. This is a place where people come for encouragement, inspiration, and to remember that they are not alone. Kelly holds a “You Matter” walk annually in September to remind people to hold on. In addition, she makes signs for people to put in their lawns that bring awareness to mental health. These signs remind people that they are important – they matter to someone.
Kelly says, “I can’t bring him back, but I can choose how I deal with his death.” She wants everyone to know, “Your feelings are valid. If you feel hopeless just know that it will get better. Your life can change. Hold on. You matter.”
To hear more of Kelly’s story watch this video: https://youtu.be/qFw4LBGK4PI
Original source can be found here.
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